Paolo turned one yesterday! I've been weaning him for the past 3 weeks - cutting back on nursing and pumping and increasing formula. I've even started adding whole cow's milk to his feedings in small amounts. I worried at first that I should wait for the doctor's OK before starting, but he's been eating (and loving!) whole milk yogurt and cottage cheese, so I knew he was ready.

As I come to end of this breastfeeding journey, there are some things I will miss and some I most definitely could live without:

Things I'll miss:

* cuddling with him first thing in the morning

* knowing there is something only I can give him

* the pride of providing nutrients for him that will help him to be healthy

* feeling like a mommy

* the way I can calm him down when he's fussy

* being able to burn calories and eat what I want without exercising

* nursing him to sleep (so sweet!)

* those moments when he looks up and smiles or laughs while he's nursing

Things I won't miss:

* cracked nipples

* clogged ducts

* leaking and having to wear breast pads

* being limited to nursing bras or tanks under all my shirts

* milk stains

* flashing my co-workers with my high-beams on my way to the bathroom to wash out my pump, post session

* having to pack a lunch every night because I don't have to time to eat out when a quarter of my lunch break is spent pumping

* getting bitten by those little teeth

* trying to get him to nurse when he's cranky and refuses

* being woken at 6-6:30am every morning by a hungry, screaming child (I realize this part will most likely continue)

* not feeling like my breasts are sexy anymore

* feeling like my body is not my own

* not being able to have an alcoholic drink on a whim

* washing bottles, caps, nipples, pump valves, burp cloths, nipple shields, and boppy covers over and over

In other words, I'll be fine when Paolo stops nursing. I am a bit sad that he's moving into toddlerhood, but I know that there are so many more exciting things ahead of us. I want our relationship to be about more than food. Today was the first morning I didn't sit in the rocking chair with him and breastfeed him - his dad took him along to get his car worked on and I got to sleep in til 8! I don't feel sore at all and I know it's only a matter of days before I dry up completely. I'm ready to close this chapter of my life, but I feel so proud that we did it! I don't know many full-time working moms who make it to the 1 year mark and I'm so glad I did.