Time to pump

On Tuesday I got some bad news from the daycare provider. Usually my husband is the one to pick up Paolo at the end of the day, but I'm taking over since he found a new job (such a relief after his recent layoff!). The woman who runs the preschool told me that she thinks that Paolo needs additional bottle each day, and that he is getting fussy and cranky right around the time when the other parents' pick up their kids. She told me he is usually crying at that time and people are starting to ask questions. I felt awful. Of course I'm not trying to starve my child or keep him on a rigid schedule, but I honestly thought he was ready to go down to 4 hours between feedings. He is almost 7 months old now, eating 3 solid meals and day and taking longer naps. The pediatrician even said it was ok.

When she told me this though, I felt like crying for 2 reasons: first, because he's been unhappy and other parents are starting to wonder why he's the "crying baby" all the time, and because I know I physically can't pump any more milk than I already am. This means that I starting giving them one bottle of formula to give him at the end of the day just in case. I felt so disappointed in myself though.

When I thought about it some more, the only moms I know who solely breastfeed are stay at home moms. It's been so busy at work that my stress levels have gone way up, and even drinking a half gallon of water a day and trying to relax, the most I've pumped in one day is 19oz. That's just enough for 2 bottles and some to mix with each of his meals. I guess I'm the only one who's being so hard on myself, and I should just realize that formula isn't bad for him or anything. It will be that extra snack to tide him over til he's picked up and if they don't use it I won't feel it's a waste to toss it.

It's a struggle for me to get out of work on time at 5:30 and I'm the last one to pick up my child. I also recently found out they don't have the budget to hire anyone to help me, so I'm going to remain super swamped. At least I'm grateful that when the day is done I can leave my work at the office and go home to think only about my family. Until the next day comes and I start all over again.